Self-Conscious

Self-conscious about facial expressions during sex

Q. I’m not going to lie; I loovveee sex and I consider myself a bit of a freak. My problem is I’m VERY self-conscious about my facial expressions during sex … any tips?

A. Given that you really enjoy sex, it’s a shame that you’ve become so self-conscious about something so inconsequential. Facial expressions during sex are a natural way to convey what you’re feeling in the moment, and when you really enjoy what you’re doing, it’s hard not to let the pleasure show all over your face. Worrying about making an embarrassing sex face may not seem that big of a deal now, but negative thoughts have a way of creeping into every aspect of our lives. When you pay your ‘inner critic’ too much heed, it creates an emotional environment that perpetuates insecurity and unease, and this causes you to find other characteristics about yourself that aren’t quite right. Let this go on too long and you definitely won’t be “loovving” sex as much as you used to. Why? Because the attention you put on worrying takes away from what your body could be experiencing. According to a study by the Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, one of the key components to having a great sex life is the ability to ‘let go’. Being sexually uninhibited means that you’re confident enough to say and do anything without being afraid of what your partner thinks. When you have self-confidence, being expressive no longer seems like a big deal because you’re not scared to be genuine, and that is what translates to continually great sex. So, short of wearing a mask or always having sex with the lights off, it’s
time for you to focus on all the fun you could be having during sex. Forget about feigning a ‘sexy face’ or doing other such things to manipulate how you come across – moves like that not only lessen your pleasure, and your partner very likely misinterprets this as you holding back. If you enjoy sex so much, don’t let this kind of stuff trip you up. Your real expressions are what is sexy about you.

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